Walking Straight

Sitting in front of the monitor screen, looking to his left, through the balcony, enjoying the view of slanted rain drops descend from the grey clouds, he just realized that he will be missing the good times he shared with friends from business schools. He knows that he would feel like an outcast and lonely when his friends graduate from college in 2011, and he will be left alone.

He gave it a try, no, several tries. He thought and also hoped that Finance and Banking might just be the thing he could live with, but it isn’t. His strong urge to not let go of his “sense of belonging” to his former friends is trying to alter the decisions he already made, just like last time.

The only thing that is different this time is that he bounced back faster and stronger than last time and he is sure that he could walk straight firmly….. at least for now he could……

Communication Arts

He is sitting in his bedroom, listening to jazz, doubting his possibilty of actually achieving the goals he set.

He wanted to graduate as soon as possible, and go abroad for higher level education.

Those were the reasons why he kept on doing what he disliked, business studies.

Those were the reasons that made him wake up every morning and travel to this awfully far university.

Those were the reasons that made him complete all the assignments for the whole semester.

Those were the reasons that made him study and memorize contents for examination every time a quiz or exam is coming up.

Now, his goals seemed impossible, considering the present situation.

Then, why does  he have to continue and force himself to study things he disliked.

Why does he still have to sit in boring lectures 6 days a week?

Why does he still have to try to understand and study the stuff he does not give a shit about?

Why?

Right now, it seemed that there are no reasons left anymore, to make him stay where he is.

He have decided to change majors to Communication Arts, even though it would cost him 1 year and 6 months more to graduate..

One of the things that he least expected would occur, which is having to study for a bachelors degree for 5 years.

But he does not care if it will take him a year longer than others to graduate, it would pull him out off prison.

The only thing he hopes now, no, KNOWs now is that this new place would definitely be better than the cold bare prison.

Well…. at least the prison is “empty” to him….

Fly me to the Moon bossa nova ver. (from Neon Genesis Evangelion, alto saxophone / piano duet)

Really cool!!!!

Permanent Body Art – Day 10

Today, in the middle of uni, the scabs on the tattoo were falling and I did not realize it until at the end of the day.

More than half of them are gone now.

I’m not sure if it fell off naturally or if it was pulled out because of friction though.

Hope its not the latter once since it causes the color to fade.

On one of the region where the scabs are pulled, the color is slightly faded…

I’m not sure if its because it is not fully healed yet or not….

Will have to seee.

Permanent Body Art – Day 9

The peelings on the scabs are becoming larger….
To be honest, its looking creepy…..

1st day of the semester today…..
Had only 1 class………………….
I hoped that I would meet someone I know in the class
Unfortunately, I don’t know anyone at all……..
Will be studying alone for “Corporate Finance”….

Permanent Body Art – Day 8

Just like yesterday, more scabs are peeling.

In fact, few small pieces of scabs already fell off [not sure if it fell off naturally or if it was pulled off when it rubbed something or during shower.].

The area on the skin, where scab fell off, is tattooed and shiny.

At first, I thought that the color came off because the shininess makes it look white.

There is this huge partially peeled scab wavering around.

Its very tempting to pull it off but I heard that by doing so, the color would come off too, so I’m trying my best to ignore it.

By the way, last night, the tattoo itched real bad.

Semester begins tomorrow…. Excited…. I will not have to stay home most of the time anymore…

…happy ……….yet lazy to travel to this awfully far campus……………………..

which is in another provice [literally]…….but still…… happy though………

Cousins coming from abroad this wednesday and thursday.

7 people altogether.

My bedroom will be used by them.. and I’ll be sleeping beneath my parent in their bedroom.. on the floor…….since the kids would be sleeping on the couch in the living room.  18 days I believe…

The only thing that I’m afraid of is the lack of capability to demand for internet access using my own computer [since its in my bedroom] when computer and internet is a big part of my life.. right now… since I go on youtube, blogging, forums,facebooking  and watching videos every single day……

Still around 17 months to go before uni is over…………………….. and hopefully flying out of the nest….even though the home will be covered in scarlet rusted liquid……………everyone sees this coming………….some tries to deny this or will do anything to prevent this…………….while some are patient and may wait for the time to come before taking action…………some may not believe or think about the things that will be coming……………but I am counting down to that very day…………..and I know that I will win this war…………….This road ahead may be shaking………but I’m willing to bet everything on it………since I, myself, am fully in charged of making myself reach the destination successfully……..I may not know if I have to turn left ……….or right ……….or go straight in the  crossroad ahead…………but I “do” know that I would have decided by the time I reached the “X” mark….

Permanent Body Art – Day 7

There are more peelings today than yesterday.
A small piece of scab actually fell off yesterday, leaving a really small tattooed region of skin….

Permanent Body Art – Day 6

I noticed that there are some spots on the scabbed area which are starting to peel of, although they are still tight.

Today, during shower, I unintentinally got too much water on it. And now, 30 minutes after the shower, the scabs are looking really dry. Too dry. Usually I keep it dry, but…. I don’t know…. I just feel that its the driest it had ever been.

Permanent Body Art – Day 5

Noticed a huge crack and several smaller cracks in the scabbed area of the healing tattoo.
Hope that it does not affect the tattoo when its fully healed.
Fingers Crossed.

Permanent Body Art – Day 4

Not much progress today.

However,visually, I noticed that the scabs, again,  became more narrowed , leaving a bigger border of inked skin.

The other half, which is not as scabbed, had this rough texture going on, just like yesterday but I can see that it is also shrinking, leaving a very thin border of inked skin.

Overall, not much progress.